Married Life

It has been a long time since I last posted, but I believe that I have very good reason. Since I last posted, I both bought a house and got married. Because of that, it is my pleasure to announce that Weird is a Compliment is no longer a solo effort. My beautiful wife has agreed to join me in posting here occasionally.

The two of us have mostly managed to settle in, and we are really enjoying just being able to spend time together. It's amazing what kind of a difference it makes when you can do things together in the evening, and don't have to worry about leaving in time to make an hour-long drive home. It's a wonderful thing to get home from work, and enjoy a quiet evening at home with my wife.

With that said, I have to express a few pet peeves with a lot of people that I have run into since our wedding. It seems like everyone wants to ask the same questions, and in most cases they should already know the answers.

1) "What did you do on your honeymoon?"

This one irritates me for several reasons, depending on who asks it and what they are specifically asking. Some people ask it as though it's a competition to see who can have the most exciting honeymoon, or travel to the most exotic locations. Others are trying to ask what specific activities we had planned. To answer this, we spent a quiet weekend at the Inner Harbor in Baltimore, and didn't really plan much of anything except alone time to get used to the whole idea of being married. It was wonderful.

Of course, that sort of answer isn't good enough for some people. In one case, someone kept pushing me about what did we have planned for our honeymoon, to the point where I gave an answer that will shock some of you. (It certainly shocked him.) If you really want to know that answer, email me. I'm not posting it here.

2) "How's married life?"

This question really irritates me, because I mostly get it from people who are married themselves, and so they should already know the big secret of married life: it's a lot like single life, which is just like life in general. People don't magically change when they get married, and Gwen is the same Gwen today that she was before our wedding.

Yes, there are adjustments to make. She fold the towels in halves, while I fold them in thirds. She puts soap into the dishwasher immediately after emptying it so she can easily tell that the dishes are dirty, and I wait to fill the soap dispenser until I run it. She's stolen the covers a time or two, and so have I.

But none of these things is really a fundamental issue, nor do these sort of things really matter that much in the long run. (Well, maybe the towels, but we won't go into that...) The only real difference between being engaged and being married is that we are discovering more and more each day how deeply we really love each other.

3) "Are you planning to have children?" "How many kids do you want?" "Are you trying for kids?"

These questions irritate me more than any others. Quite frankly, it's no one else's business when we plan to have kids, how many kids we plan to have, or whether we are trying to have kids right now.

If we want you to know when or if we're having kids, we'll let you know. We're still getting used to the whole idea of being married, and we're not really focusing on children right now. When that changes, we'll be sure to let all of you know within a year or so of our getting pregnant. Otherwise, if you are going to ask these questions, you had better be prepared to provide babysitting services (for free) when we do have kids, because I consider such questions to be volunteering.

I don't want to seem like I am just complaining, though. I'm grateful that so many people care about both of us to the point where they are interested in our lives. But I do wish that some people would learn to temper their curiosity with a little more common sense. At the very least, I would prefer that people come up with some more personalized and unique questions.

Is that too much to ask?

The Big Reveal

And now, behold! The promised pictures the soon-to-be Mrs. I think you will all have the same question that my friends and coworkers have asked when seeing Gwen for the first time:

"What's a girl like her doing with a guy like you? Couldn't she find someone better?"

I fully recognize that I really don't measure up to a woman as amazing and wonderful as she is, but I do keep on trying. For some reason, she thinks that's enough.
This is our official engagement picture.


This is the last picture that we took that day. It was just a spur of the moment one, but I think it was one of the best overall.


We were told to walk up the path together, but I was in the mood for a game of tag.

And finally, just to prove that she really can deal with me quite easily:

Have I mentioned that I think Gwen is absolutely wonderful, and I am so blessed to know her, let alone be marrying her?

It's a Crazy Life

It seems like every time I post, I start by apologizing for not posting. Sorry, but that's life.

I'm still alive and kicking. A lot has happened, and yet it seems like I'm still right where I was before.

I'm still waiting for the final approval on the house, still waiting for the wedding, and still dealing with things day-to-day. I'm starting to get impatient at the wait. Like Inigo Montoya, "I hate waiting."

Darn it, I don't want to wait another month for my house. I don't want to wait another 75 days to get married (but who's counting). I don't want to be patient. I just want to be able to move forward with everything.

But, all in all, life is good. Yesterday, Gwen and I went to Cabell's Mill and took our engagement pictures. My old friend Meghan borrowed my camera and took the pictures for us (and it only cost me a grilled cheese sandwich, some tomato soup, and some ice cream). She did a phenomenal job, and really brought out the beauty of Gwen's hair. I will try to post some of the pictures later today.

We hope to have the announcements ready to mail in a week or three, but I am in the process of verifying addresses. If I haven't contacted you already to verify your mailing address, and you want to be sure to get one, drop me an email.

That about covers everything for now. I will endeavor to post more often in the future.

Big news!

I will keep this short, because I have to get to bed soon, but I have some wonderful news to share.

Today, my girlfriend and I announced to our families that she is not my girlfriend, but my fiancée. We are getting married this coming October in the Washington DC Temple.

There is so much more that I could say right now, but suffice it to say that Gwen is the most amazing woman I have ever met. She is intelligent, witty, charming, beautiful, and has a smile that can disarm anyone. She somehow has a way of seeing who I really am, and yet she actually seems to like what she sees. She deserves far better than me, but she doesn't seem to want anyone else.

I don't deserve a woman like her in my life, but if she can't see that, I'm certainly not going to try to change her mind. To quote Nanky-Poo from The Mikado, "She shall never learn the truth from me."

I'm a Lucky Man

Yesteday was a very good day, for many reasons.

First, I have a ratified contract on a house!

It's not the same house that I mentioned last time (I missed out on that one and one other in the past month), but it's a very good one. It's a 3 bed, 2 bath house on 1/6 acre, with a decent-sized kitchen and a master bedroom suite.

Its location puts me only 15-20 minutes away from work, as compared to the hour-long commute that I have now. It's even right down the street from one of the 6 elementary schools that I attended as a kid.

It has a small, wood-framed shed in the back that I can convert into a decent workshop. It even has electricity wired to the shed!

Now, admittedly, it does have its own share of problems. For example, when they added an addition, they built the laundry room just inside the master bedroom when it would have been trivial to put it in the same place, but be accessible from the dining room. But that will be an easy fix (cut a hole in one wall for a door, and build a wall where there is an opening now). The main bathroom also has a faux tile, fiberglass backstop for the tub/shower area. I'd need to replace that with some real tile when I have the time. The attic is perfect for a lot of storage, but it will need insulationm but that's relatively easy to do.

Most important of all, it is a place where I could raise a family. It has enough room to let me go a good 5-10 years before I'm likely to need a bigger house. It's in a quiet neighborhood with good schools (the same schools that several of my cousins attended, actually), and it's close to a lot of good, wholesome activities.

It's a short sale, which means that the seller's bank needs to approve the offer (and that can take several weeks), but if all goes well, I will be in my own home by July.

Second, I got to spend a wonderful evening at the Temple doing baptisms for several of my own ancestors. I met my girlfriend and her father up there after work (she was already there as a Temple worker, and he had just finished a session), and I got baptize her for 12 of my ancestors, and I was baptized for another 12. Her father then confirmed both of us for those ancestors.

This was only the third time in my memory that I have had the opportunity to do baptisms for my ancestors, and it is always a powerful experience. I was reminded of the first time, about 10 years ago. I had just taken out my own Endowment a week or so earlier, and my father, sister, and I went one Friday night to do the family baptisms. I got to baptize Mer for 10 ancestors, then our father baptized me for the rest. It was such an incredible experience. To me, it ranks right up there with the day that my brother was ordained a Priest by our father, and then he stood up, walked around the chair, and ordained me a Deacon.

Just in general, life is good. I have a good (albeit busy), stable job. I am buying a house that I can call my own. I have a beautiful, intelligent, witty, and charming girlfriend (which is another story completely, but will have to wait until later). I am reminded of the last verse and chorus of Montgomery Gentry's song "Lucky Man":

Got some friends who would be here fast
I could call em any time of day
Got a brother who's got my back
Got a mama who I swear's a saint
Got a brand new rod and reel
Got a a full week off this year
Dad had a close call last spring
It's a miracle he's still here

But I know I'm a lucky man
God's given me a pretty fair hand
Got a house and a piece of land
a few dollars in a coffee can
My old truck's still running good
My ticker's tickin' like they say it should
I got supper in the oven, good woman's loving
And one more day to be my little kid's dad
Lord, knows I'm a lucky man

My old trucks still running good
My ticker's ticking like they say it should
I got supper in the oven, a good woman's loving
And even my bad days ain't that bad
Yeah, I'm a lucky man
I'm a lucky lucky man

I truly am a very lucky man.

You Load 16 Tons, What Do You Get?

I have some good news to report.

Last night, I put in an offer on a house! Yes, I have taken a major step towards digging a quarter million dollar hole for myself.

Of course, it's a nice house, and in the end it will cost me about the same each month as my current rent would, meaning that it's more-or-less revenue neutral for me. (The total cost will be more each month, but I'll also get significant tax breaks from buying, making it cost only about $10-15 more than my current rent each month.)

The house is a 3-level (basement, main floor, and finished attic/master bedroom) 5 bedroom, 2 bath Cape Cod-style home. It has 2 bedrooms, a bath, and a kitchenette area in the basement with a separate entrance, creating a mother-in-law apartment area, and a deck that is big enough to throw one heck of a barbecue. It even has some nice French doors leading from the kitchen to the deck.

Now, it will need a lot of work, but it's livable immediately. The kitchen will need to be completely redone, but that's more because I want to build my kitchen, not because it's a disaster area. I figure that I can fix up the kitchenette area first (it needs some minor work), and then use that as a temporary kitchen while I remodel the upstairs. Like any new living space, it will need a coat or two of paint, and there are other minor updates.

I'd love to add a small workshop area (but, unlike my father's shop, I think I will focus on more hand tools than power tools). I hope to add a good set of food storage shelves. I'd love to take out the crumbling stone chimney/grill in the back yard, and replace it with a brick or stone smoker. But those are all things that can wait for a while, if need be.

Is it the perfect house? No. But if all goes well, it will be my house, and that's the most important part.

Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread

I love baking. One of my favorite foods is freshly baked bread. Not only does it just taste good (I can eat it as a complete meal, fresh from the oven), but it makes the kitchen, and from there the entire house, smell incredible.

Last week, my mother sent me this link to a recipe for making artisan-style bread. After trying it out, I had to run out and buy a copy of the cookbook it came from. Let me tell you, it is amazing!

The basic idea is that you make a large batch of a wet dough, and then store it in your refrigerator. When you want to have a loaf of bread, you pull off a chunk of the dough, shape it, let it rise, and bake it. Other than the time that you spend waiting for it to rise or bake, it takes all of about 5 minutes of work.

Even better, it's cheap. I figure it costs me about $0.50-$0.75 per loaf, and a similar loaf (not as fresh) would cost me about $4.00 from the store. I can live with those sort of numbers.

So far, I have stuck with the basic recipe (given at that link), which produces a wonderful sourdough flavor. And the longer you let the dough sit around in the fridge, the better that flavor gets. However, the cookbook has recipes for everything from bagels to pitas. The recipe I am looking forward to making next (after I use up the dough from my current batch) is oatmeal pumpkin bread:

Oatmeal Pumpkin Bread

1 c. pumpkin
2 c. lukewarm water (about 100-110 degrees Fahrenheit)
1 1/2 T. granulated yeast (1 1/2 packets)
1 T kosher salt
5 T. unsalted butter, melted
1/3 c. honey
1/2 c. old-fashioned oats
3/4 c. whole wheat flour
3/4 c. rye flour
4 c. unbleached all-purpose flour

Mix the yeast and salt with the water, melted butter, and honey in a 5-quart bowl or a lidded container. Mix in the oatmeal, pumpkin, and flours using a wooden spoon. Cover (not airtight) and allow it to rest at room temperature until the dough rises and slightly collapses. (This should take about 2 hours.) The dough is now ready to use. You can refrigerate it for about 1 1/2 weeks until you want a loaf.

When you are ready to use the dough, grease a non-stick bread loaf pan. Dust the surface of the dough with flour, and pull off a large chunk, about the size of a cantaloupe. Form the dough into a ball, and let it rise in the pan for about 40 minutes (if the dough is fresh) or 2 hours (if it has been refrigerated). Twenty minutes before you plan to bake it, set the oven to 350 degrees and put a pan on the top rack to hold water. Place the loaf on a center rack and pour at least 1 c. of hot water into the pan on the top rack (to create steam during the baking). Bake it for 45-50 minutes, or until done.

Cool and serve.

As soon as I can find a decent supply of rye flour, I plan to try this recipe out. They claim it should make about 3 loafs.

I highly recommend this cookbook. It is easily one of the best ones I have found, anywhere.

Sorry Carrie

but you just can't match the original. But then, very few remakes or covers ever can.

In case you are wondering, Carrie Underwood recently did a cover of an old Randy Travis song that I love. I'm sorry, but she just can't match the rich, gravelly quality of his voice, and that is exactly what that song needs. But don't take my word for it.

The original:


Carrie's version:


I don't usually care for remakes, whether it be songs, movies, or anything else. But there are a few remakes that I think equal or even exceed the originals. Chief among those is Battlestar Galactica. If you have not seen this show, you need to get your hands on it right now. But don't start in the middle. Whatever you do, start it from the beginning and do not skip ahead. If you skip ahead, or (heaven forbid) start watching the new episodes this Friday (there are only 4 episodes remaining in the series), you will ruin the entire mystery and suspense of the show. Don't do that to yourself.

There are also a few songs that have been excellent remakes. I think that Clint Black's rendition of "Desperado" easily equals (but doesn't exceed) the original version by the Eagles. And Chris LeDoux's version of "Life is a Highway" (not to be confused with the crapfest remake by Rascal Flatts) beats (barely) Tom Cochrane's original.

Another remake which has grown on me considerably is Alison Krauss' remake of Keith Whitley's "When You Say Nothing at All". At first, I didn't care for her version, until I heard a remix that combined both versions into a duet, and I heard how perfectly her voice matched the words and music. Now, when I hear her version, I don't even find myself missing the differences between her interpretation and his.

Now, don't get me wrong. Carrie Underwood's version of "I Told You So" is wonderful, but she's no Randy Travis, and that song really needs a deep voice like his. If Josh Turner had done the remake, it might beat Travis' version, but I can't think of another artist today who might come close.

Promises to Keep

I made a promise to a friend a while ago, but never got around to keeping it. Since I'm having trouble sleeping tonight, I thought I'd finally catch up and get it out of the way.

And so, for your enjoyment, here are some recipes I have collected from a variety of sources. Some of them are crock pot recipes (as I promised you, Amy), others are old family favorites, and still more are from a variety of other sources.

I'm still adding to the file, but I figured I'd put the current version out there for now. I'll let all of you know when I've updated it.

Planning

Last Monday, I started actually looking at houses to buy. I went and saw 5 houses spread out all over Northern Virginia, a couple of them are very real possibilities. I'm already moving forward to the next step of locking down my financing and getting pre-approved for my mortgage.

As I go through the process, I am becoming more and more grateful for the summer I spent as an intern at a mortgage company. Even though I was developing a disaster recovery procedures database for them, I still managed to pick up a lot of information that I didn't realize I had learned until I started to need it. It's funny how you never know what you really know until you have to use the knowledge that you have.

I have also started looking at plans for this year. Last summer, I was asked to play "big brother" to Kandice, one of my younger sister's friends who was here for an internship. We got some groups together and did a variety of trips up and down the East Coast, to places such as Williamsburg, Philadelphia, or Monticello. While Kandice has gone back home, and a few other people from those groups have moved away, I think that I want to start assembling groups for similar trips this year.

For example, according to this list, there were 123 civil war battles fought in Virginia, not counting another 2 in Pennsylvania, 7 in Maryland, and 15 in West Virginia. Most, if not all, of those battlefields should be within range of a weekend day trip.

I am somewhat ashamed to admit this, but I have never been to New York City. I've passed through the city twice: once on train, and once driving, but I have never actually visited the city. I think that this year I'd like to get some people together and change that. (I have, however, seen the Statue of Liberty from a distance, courtesy of a business trip to New Jersey. Someday I want to see it closer up.)

When I was in elementary school, I was required to read the book Misty of Chincoteague. I'd love to be able to visit Chincoteague Island or its neighbor Assateague Island where the book was set. If I can work it out, I'd love to be there for Pony Penning Day, although with my plan to buy a house in June that may not be an option this year.

I'd love to visit the Naval Academy in Annapolis. My father was in the Navy for over 18 years (although he didn't attend the Academy), and I would love to go visit all of the history there.

This may sound funny, but I'd love to visit the top of the Washington Monument on a clear day. I've lived near DC for the past 23 years, and I have never gone to the top. I've visited all of the other memorials and monuments, but that one has always seemed like too much of a hassle because of the lines.

Similarly, I've travelled to Atlantic City for work dozens of times in the past three years, but I've never actually gone down to Atlantic City itself. I've always stayed close to the airport, where my work was. One of my trips this year, I want to go down and walk on the Boardwalk.

Most of all, I want to find more people to go and do these things with. (If anyone knows anyone who would be interested, let me know.) I don't even have to get to everything on the list this year. I'm already committing to staying in the area for another 5 years or so. I just want to get in the habit of doing trips like this, before I miss out on so many opportunities.

So, if any of you think you might be in the area and interested in some sort of outing or trip like this, please let me know.

A Time for Changes

Well, it's a new year. (Yes, I know I'm a week late. Get over it!) A lot has happened for me, so I guess it's time to review a bit of it.

First of all, I can finally be a bit more specific about my plans for the future. As of January 1, I have enough money in the bank to make the down payment on a house in the DC area. I can now afford to buy a house costing up to $250k.

The only catch is that now I need to find the right house. What does that mean? Well, I'm looking for the following features:

1. Detached, 3 bedroom, 2 bath house (but I'll take more rooms if I can find them). This is important to "future proof" the purchase, and also just to have room to live. After all, if I buy the house, I'll likely be living there for at least 5 years, and who knows where I could be by then. (Married with 3 kids? Certainly possible in theory.) It will also maximize the resale value whenever I do finally sell it.
   
2. It must have natural gas available. If I am buying a house, I want to be able to build my kitchen, and that will require a gas stove. I've spent too long cooking on electric stoves with little or no control over the heat. If it doesn't have a gas stove when I buy it, I need to be able to put one in with a minimum of fuss.
3. My commute cannot get any longer. As it is, it takes me about an hour each way to get to work. I'm not willing to sacrifice even more of my life to my employment. That means that I can't move any farther away from DC than Fairfax, where I currently am. Also, the closer to Metro, the better.
   
4. I would like at least either a basement or a fireplace. Preferably a basement (I can always put in a wood burning stove). The basement should be big enough to give me enough shop space for minor woodworking.
5. Most importantly, it cannot be located in any ward where I either have lived before, or have close relatives. My mother's brother and sister have both lived in their respective wards pretty much since before I was born. I would never be able to effectively build an identity separate from them if I moved into either of their wards. Similarly, I couldn't move into the ward that I grew up in, because it would be too awkward, and I don't think my brother needs me moving into his ward for the same reason.

If all goes well, I'll be able to find the right place and move in by the middle of the year. I'm sure I'll write more about it as it gets to be more of a reality.

This may surprise or shock some of you, but I also have become a certifiable gun nut. I've always enjoyed spending time with quality firearms (they are true marvels of engineering, and it helps that my brother worked for the NRA for 10 years), but I have finally joined the ranks of gun owners. My current collection stands at three guns - a hunting rifle, a handgun (a Colt 1991 .45 - the gun that served as the military's standard from WWI up until the mid-80s, and is still preferred by Special Forces), and a "fun" rifle (a WASR10 - the Romanian semi-automatic version of the AK-47, which is probably the most common rifle in the world because it is so well designed). When I get the chance, I will post some pictures if anyone wants to see them.

But before any of you can get worried, let me just say that there is nothing to fear from any of my guns. I am well trained in all aspects of gun safety, and keep them properly secured whenever they are not in use. The only people who have anything to fear from my guns are those who try to harm either me or my loved ones. Guns are not something to be feared, but they are deserving of respect. As long as they are properly handled, maintained, and stored, they are perfectly safe.

I am also in the process of applying for a CCW (Concealed Carry of Weapons) permit in Virginia. As part of that, I am required to demonstrate proficiency both in using a gun as well as in when not to use a gun. It also requires a lot of study and thought about the law on self defense, and is not something that should be done without careful thought. For me, it will simply be one more tool, in addition to others that I have, to defend myself and my loved ones. It is always better to learn how to use tools before you need them, even though I hope I never need to use them.

Other than that, I have very little I could complain about. I have a good job, good friends, and a good life. My family is all in good health (with the exception of my father's broken leg/ankle - be careful on the ice), I got to meet not one, not two, but three new neices and nephews over Christmas, and I spent some good time with my two older nephews. My brother-in-law is back from a year overseas, and I look forward to seeing him in the next few months. I have some homemade baklava sitting on the table downstairs, just waiting to absorb all of the syrup so I can eat it, and I am feeling healthier than I have in a long time.

Right now, it looks like 2009 will be quite an active and momentous year for me. I've pretty much put my life in order, and am moving myself out of the holding pattern that I've been in for the past year or so. I'm finally getting around to doing several things that I have meant to do for a while (including starting a paper journal).

In other words, life is good! Why should I complain?